OK, LETS SEE...

- SENSE OF HUMOR?
CHECK!

- FINANCIALLY SECURE?
WELL, I TAKE CARE OF MYSELF... SO CHECK!

- SYMPATHETIC?
YUP, CHECK!

- BODY?
FOR MY AGE & LIFESTYLE? S'ALRIGHT.

- PERSONABLE?
IF YA GET TO KNOW ME, I'M OK... CHECK!

- OUTGOING?
SURE, I'LL TRY IT... CHECK!

- LOOKS?
AVERAGE...

SO, WHAT AM I MISSING?
DO I HAVE TO "MAKE" STUFF TO SHOW I'M CREATIVE?
DO I HAVE TO DRESS OUTLANDISHLY TO SHOW I'M AN INDIVIDUAL?
NOT ENOUGHT TATOOS, OR TOO MANY?

WHAT THE FUCK AM I DOING WRONG?!